The day started at 6:00 AM, with Anthony, Sharene and I embarking on a four-hour journey to Yosemite. Throughout the day, the drive was filled with 90's pop and...Sean Paul. Our first stop was a gas station at Tracey, where we unknowingly chose the most expensive gas station of the lot, Valero. Only after the gas was pumped and we continued our way did we realize that there was a 711 gas station (wtf, right), Shell and Arco and we chose the one station that was exactly 8 cents more than the rest. (Well, at least Sharene, Anthony and I found that highly amusing.)
We started seeing speckles of snow as we got closer to Yosemite. Then as we approached even closer, we noticed TONS of snow, which made me nervous because I was barefoot in my mocassins. DON'T JUDGE MEEEE, they were the only shoes I brought home. Anthony and I had already decided the previous day that we wanted to hike at Hetch Hetchy to see waterfalls, and with all the snow, there was no way I could get away without frostbitten toes.
Fortunately, Anthony happened to have his whole wardrobe and then some in his trunk and I was able to gather socks and the puffiest Vans ever. We went into Yosemite, wandered around in the freezing cold (no joke, it was sooo effing cold), got some sandwiches, got struck in the head multiple times by CHUNKS of falling snowballs and then got lost for about an hour trying to get out. After numerous attempts driving around in Yosemite Village, we finally made our way to HETCH HETCHY.
Apparently that's the reservoir that gives hydropower to San Francisco MUNI and what not. I don't know, I didn't look into detail at the little information plaques, but it was really serene and nice. Little did we know the insanity that would ensue.
Step 1: Getting to the other side of the wet, dark and overall creepy tunnel.
Anthony, Sharene and I stood at the entrance of the tunnel, completely baffled at the idea that we literally needed to get across this tunnel. There were huge puddles, and hardly any light and our already looming fear of bears and mountain lions made it extremely difficult to brace ourselves to enter into the tunnel. The three of us ended up furiously sprinting to the other side, leaping over giant puddles and then talking about how incredibly frightful it was for the next fifteen minutes. Seriously, though. That shit was terrifying.
Step 2: Get over the rivers (aka streams, aka LARGE streams, kthanks) throughout the trail.
I was especially excited for the waterfalls. As Anthony is my witness, I could not stop talking about the waterfalls, and every time a waterfall appeared, I squealed like a...very cute minature pot-bellied pig, thank you. (Which Anthony and I will both own one day.) So we went on the 5-mile round trip Hetch Hetchy trail that consisted of three major waterfalls. We only had two hours to complete it because we arrived at this park at 3 and it closes at 5. After the tretrecherous tunnel, we came across our first river. We were pretty O_O about it until we passed through two more. The third one was the worst. Unfortunately, we were unable to film or take pictures, but take my word...SO BAD. The water was pretty fast and the river was pretty deep and it was just bad times. But good times because we got through it, with our shoes soaking wet and accomplishment on our faces. :]
Step 3: Climb over rocks, mud, newts and water beetles.
Sharene noticed numerous newts slash salamanders. Anthony spotted numerous small rodents. I noticed the water beetle Sharene accidentally stomped on. Quite an accomplishment. The hike was pretty intense. We hiked over rocks and streams and muddy messes.
Step 4: Rush to last stop waterfall, Wapama, before 4:40 PM.
We had approximately one hour and 40 minutes to make it around the hike and an extra 20 minutes to drive to the exit. So we hustled over the previously mentioned boulders, rocks and LARGE streams to get to the last waterfall. Every time we thought we heard the Wapama waters, we ended up looping around somewhere else. We were on the verge of giving up after finding Wapama behind a hill every time, but obviously, we eventually reached the bridge beneath the falls. The refreshing mist hit our proud faces and we marveled in the glory of reaching our 2.5 mile destination. Little did we know that this euphoria (thanks, thesaurus.com) was going to be somewhat shortlived.
Step 5: Escape bears, mountain lions and...squirrels, oh my.
So as we were admiring Wapama Falls, I walked across the bridge hoping to see a better glimpse of the falls around the rocks. I hear Sharene call me and say, "Lisa, there are bear prints!" As I walked back to her and Anthony, she's pointing at the snow on the bridge and there are FRESH BEAR PAW PRINTS. My heart dropped. Like, I literally felt my palms sweating immediately and we HIGH-TAILED THE EFF OUT OF THERE. We all had a serious moment of adrenaline rush as we raced up the rock stairs. As always, I'm trailing behind the two and as I'm heaving and sweating bullets, I'm imagining the bear coming behind me, putting his massive, cold, snow-covered paw over my mouth and annihilating my poor, frail body and Sharene and Anthony would have never had a clue until I was already inside the bear's belly. Video below of bear print reactions:
As we were hustling ourselves as far away from the bear prints as possible (thank goodness the prints were headed AWAY from us), we had to re-pass the rivers slash streams. We passed by the big one without too much trouble, but I wasn't as lucky for the second one. Sharene went ahead of me and as I stuck my giant shoe out to steady myself, my foot ended up slipping straight into the water and I ended up sprawled like a starfish with my belly against a giant boulder and my shoe collecting water. Please notice Anthony's shoes:
So I'm sprawled up against the boulder in shock that I actually slipped into the water. I feel like a failure and Anthony and Sharene are staring at me while I'm staring at them. Anthony's like, "GET UP!" and I look at Sharene and she's like, "GET UP!" and so...I get up. My sock...errr, Anthony's sock is completely soaked and we continue our race away from the bear. By the way...I bruised my arm and leg and felt like a fool, all the way until Anthony and Sharene continued laughing at me 4 hours later at Chili's.
So we're perservering (thanks again, thesaurus.com) on our 2.5 mile hike back to the car and we notice a large pile of poop that was not previously there. We thought it belonged to the bear, but his bear prints proved that he was walking ahead of us, so the timing of the poop didn't make any sense. So Sharene concluded that it was the excrement of a mountain lion. THANKS, SHARENE. If the evidence of a large bear roaming around us wasn't terrifying enough, now I was convinced a mountain lion was also going to rip my body into shreds. We kept hearing rustling and what not on the hills next to us, but I refused to look and psych myself out. I obviously would be the first one to die because even at a time of such distress, I believed that my ignorance of my surroundings was bliss. Eventually we reached the tunnel again and it was just as scary as the first time around. We quickly strided in, arm in arm, and HOORAH, we reached civilazation and we survived the Hetch Hetchy hike. We were the ONLY people on the trail. Probably in the whole Hetch Hetchy area.
Once the hike was over, it was easy to declare what an amazing hike it was. But I think we were all honestly fretting over our lives all the way until we reached the car. The hike took longer than 2 hours, and when we reached the exit, we ended up getting a citation for staying at the park for too long. National security and whatever bullshit. The park ranger was rude and probably hated life because the citation was $175. Anthony hasn't decided whether he'll fight it or pay it, but we're obviously all going to pitch in. BUT WE WERE NOT GOING TO LET THAT RUIN OUR DAY. After mulling over it for some fifteen minutes, we cheered up and listened to some more '90s pop. <3
Step 6: Get a picture next to ridiculous town sign.
This is the first time I've stopped in the middle of a highway to take a picture next to a sign. Welcome to Chinese Camp, population 150, and probably 1/3 consisting of cows. There were a herd of cows directly across from this sign and they all marveled at the sight of humans outside a vehicle. All 20-something cows turned their heads towards us and stared as they hobbled closer and closer. Then they lost interest and continued eating their grass.
We all desperately had to use the bathroom, but Anthony being the only one with the penis was the only one able to do so with the least indecent exposure. As ode to Chinese Camp, he left his mark.
After a bite to eat at Chili's in San Bruno, the day was over. It was great to be out of Riverside, out of San Francisco, out of the city life and just enjoy nature, ferocious animals and all. It felt good to get away from EVERYTHING and just marvel at beautiful things this world has to offer that does not include drama, boys, or sex.
Thanks, Anthony and Sharene, for a beautiful day at Yosemite slash all the pictures and videos used for this post. <33333
the end.
p.s. this shit took two days to write. I have never devoted this much time to any post on a blog.
No comments:
Post a Comment